Everything is perfect right now. I have a ton, a ton of work to do and two essay due next week and a math test of Friday and so much to do this weekend, but despite all the stress, I am good right now. It might just be because I’m on a bit of a sugar high and therefore blocking all of my stress from my mind, but right now I’m fine.
I decided not to go to the hall trick o treating but Beka, Margarit, Maria and I had fun handing out candy for a bit. Plus Jackie, Amanda, Katie and Ellen stopped by and we had throwing candy corn into each others mouths contests. Jackie is failing quite a few classes and is starting to skip classes more so we’re all stressing out about her and her falling so far behind she’ll have to drop out. I really don’t want that to happen. It won’t seem right without her here.
I’m mostly writing though to say how tired I am of missing people. All I keep thinking of is this post I wrote in July (https://headingoeste.wordpress.com/2012/07/29/the-five-degrees-of-missing/) and how much I miss my pool family, and my church family and my AMIGOS family and my Panama family and Rachael and my family family and my Kneesters and Francesca, Joelle, Piera and Iida and Samantha and Grandma and Grandpa and everyone. It’s so crazy to think about where I was a year ago–trick o treating with Iida, Em, Erms and Mary Kate. That seems so impossibly long ago. How is that? I just want to hold everyone I love in my arms forever. Wouldn’t that be nice if that was how it worked?
I hate time and I’m scared of how it’s going to change everything. I hate not knowing how it has. That’s the real Halloween scare, if anything.