two

I just watched a movie about two young women who when they met were the farthest from friends but grew quickly to become people that would sacrifice themselves for each other. I know this feeling. I have lived this feeling–perhaps not to the same extent but I know it somewhat. I have two questions. The first is when will I ever have a fight worth dying for? Oh I know. What a strange thing to wish for–a fight that could lead to death, but it is something that I read about in books and watch in movies and it is something that I want to fill my soul. I saw a movie today in a full theater with my parents. The movie was about Abe Lincoln and it made me realize so many things but most of all, it made me realize how much he sacrificed for the sake of this country and it’s people and the ideas of freedom and equality. Will I ever be able to fight like that? To swallow fears and desires for something bigger than myself? I fear that such a fight is harder to come by today but at the same time, I fear that it is much easier than it ever has been before. My second question? Oh it is a simple one but perhaps one that is harder than any question I have asked before. My question is: when will I be able to capture all of these feelings that swim around my heart and tie them down to paper so that the world can feel them too? I want that more than anything but yet I fear it is my desire that is farthest from my grip. I reach and it slips. Will it ever become trapped? Will it ever become mine?

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