old, new, best

i must admit that the idea for this post comes from something i spend a great deal of my time doing [unfortunately]: stalking the internet. i found a friend’s friend’s blogpost about her group of high school friends and how they’ve been friends for 7 years and how long that seems once she thinks about how old she is. and so i got to thinking about my groups of friends.

the longest in the making (8 years) is these lovely ladies:

Spring 025So much has changed. In so many ways. We’ve all seen things that are burnt into the back of our eyelids, that we’ll never un-see. Sometimes we need each other, more than anything.

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Sometimes we need one of each other more than we need others but in the end, if I fall, when I fall, I know they are there. 575897_10150826373284882_1612797878_n

They were the beginning. My first true group of girlfriends. They taught me so much, of what being a true friend, a good friend means. About what it means to be a good person too and how sometimes, that is the hardest thing.

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We grew up together in every single way.

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And for that, we are forever intertwined.

Next is a group that came together at different times, in different ways, through different connections, some strokes of luck and others clear decisions. All of this, the twisted patterns of fate, makes it hard to declare when the beginning is. Some people, some lovely women who have changed my life, who were there in the beginning are not there anymore, but that doesn’t make them any less important. I will declare the time, the beginning, as 8th grade, although the true birth of my Kneesters was not until somewhere between 10th and 11th. The count is 6.

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There are few pictures from the beginning. I’m not sure why. I chose this group though. That’s what matters. I got up one day and I chose what would become them.

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Which means that every day I got up and I chose them again. And again. And again until it wasn’t even a thought in my head anymore. Until it was everything. Until they were everything.

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They are the only reason I made it through high school in tact, in one piece, smiling and hopeful.

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They are what kept me sane when I was living on my own, 500 miles from home and was questioning my decision.

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They gave me hope.

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They gave me laughter. Support. Smiles. Love.

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They do. They still do.

Last there is the newest. Their count is less than 1.

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They were not what I expected because I expected nothing at all.

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So far from home, I never thought I would fall, but I did. Of course I did and it was their arms that caught me.

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They taught me to talk, deep and from the heart, to tell the truth and to cry.

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They made me laugh when I was pulled down by tests and papers and work and stress. When I thought that I would never laugh, couldn’t laugh, wouldn’t laugh.

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They showed me their lives and their worlds and they changed my own.

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So different, we are all the same for one reason…

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We care about each other,

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About each others’ dreams,

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Most importantly though, we love each other.

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They are my sisters.

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And they always will be.

Of course there has been others. Other people, individuals. Elyse. Rachael. William. Iida. Samantha. Piera. But these are the groups and there is something about belonging to a group of friends that changes you forever. So if you’re reading this and you are part of one of these groups: thank you, from the deepest corners of my heart.

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