i have so many things to write about, so many different words that are running from my finger tips that i must write, that i have been waiting to write. i don’t really know where to start but the best things are like that, the best things are so overwhelming that you can not begin to fathom how to begin to explain them.
i suppose i will start with Guatemala. I can not really write about this journey of mine. it was a lot to deal with at moments, since i did not always agree with everything that was going on and how it was being handled, but for the most part, it was so amazing and even the hard parts were worth it because, like in every moment of my life, i grew so much for my experiences.
i can not explain how empowering it is to stand at a Mayan ritual sight and translate from Spanish to English the history and religion that is being shared with you. i can not explain how much it strengthens my lungs to climb step and step and yet another step up the side of the mountains of San Lucas Toliman. My lungs ached. My legs aches, but the challenge and the sight I saw when I reached the top, over and over again filled my heart with joy. The wind whipped through my hair as we raced down the roads in the back of the pick up. My arms flew out into the air and the smile on my face took over. The smell of the lake as we raced across the bright water in the boat made my every bone feel lighter. When we walked through the jungle at night I gave myself over to my environment completely. I could not see. I was blind in the most insane way possible and it was something that made my heart race. But I did it. I survived the jungle at night and letting go in that way renewed my faith in myself, just as letting go again when I flew through the jungle on a zip-line did. I have power. I can concur my mind. I have flown on a 33 seater plane. I have held hands. I have made souls laugh. I can, I can, I can.
The fireworks literally rained down on top of us on New Year’s Eve and as we screamed the 10 second countdown to the New Year, my heart was full. Full because I was-am-blessed to be able to travel, to learn more from the people of this world, but maybe even more so because in that moment, as the whole night sky all around the lake sparkled and shined with a rainbow of colors, I was surrounded by 6 of my sisters. Their arms wrapped around me and in their native languages, they wished me a happy new year. I knew all of these young woman before we left the country, but now we are tied together by experiences and moments that nobody else will understand. Words were exchanged. They understand the corners of my heart and we exchanged ideas and fears and tears and concerns and struggles. 10 days is not forever but sometimes it can seem just like it is. I am so grateful for them all, for Anna and Olivia and Steve and Brenda too and for everyone else that my path crosses with. Like Anna said to us in the Houston airport: I am sure my path will cross with some of these people again, but even if it doesn’t, they have changed my life. As I told Anna and Sam as we raced down the winding roads of the Guatemalan country side: I believe everyone person who comes into my life–no matter for how long or how short–affects my life in some way and the experiences I had in Guatemala, each one of them, showed me again and again how strong I am and how I need to not doubt that fact-because that’s what it is: a fact.