how do i explain this feeling? i know what my soul needs–a good workout, a hot shower, hot chocolate, and time with my words and someone else’s–but here I am, in the library, where I thought I should be in order to heal. how ironic can i become? i told Hazel just today that it is okay to make sacrifices in order to secure your own wellness. it’s okay to take time for yourself. if you need to go home, go. how can i sit here, stand there, whatever and tell her that and then not act upon it? nothing is due tomorrow. i can take a moment to recover from this feeling of helplessness, of hopelessness, of stress, of burdens, of not being able to get out of these responisbilities, of not being enough. i deal with these feelings and more every day and when i can’t take them anymore, it’s okay to move on for a moment, to move away.
so how can i know this and not act upon it???
people become too much for me too often.