sometimes decisions are easy to make. sometimes, they are hard. sometimes, they seem easy. sometimes, they seem hard.
i can’t seem to let go of a place that was fifty percent hell and fifty percent heaven and i’m not sure why. some of it has to do with the waiting in line i am currently do, part of it has to do with the way my 100% is made up.
i know what i could have done and i suppose that it would have been fine. but i didn’t want that, not again. and yet, i miss parts of it. always. i think i will always miss the good parts of it.
isn’t that how retrospect works?
the good seems better, and the bad fades to grey from the darkest black it was.
that’s why missing things becomes so hard. so easy?
i think to miss is my least favorite feeling.