i cried when i crossed the north carolina boarder and all i could do was ask myself why.
why are you crying, dear one? why does your heart ache?
i rolled through all the possible answers in my head: i miss my family already, i want to go back to spain, i’m tired, i’m hungry, i’m stressed, but i was lying to myself with every syllable of those words. i already knew the answer.
there are two:
i want to be done. summer and spain were more in the ‘real’ world than i have ever been before and i already longed for that person.
the second answer was part of the first: salem has been light, yes, but shadows play in light. and i’m scared of that darkness creeping back in.
how do you win when you’re afraid?
easy: you do it all anyway.